At what age do you officially hit the danger zone of becoming a spinster? Is there a magical date that pops up in your adult years that declares that time is up and your dating life is now toast, or is it simply when we give up ourselves? Is it when you start to notice the peculiarities of your pet that normal fur-parents overlook…is it when you start referring to yourself as a fur-parent?! Maybe it’s when your relatives stop asking if you are seeing anyone. Maybe it’s when you have resigned yourself to an endless cycle of tv reruns in the worlds most lived in pair of pajamas….
If, like me, you answered yes to or agreed with any of the afore mentioned, there is a possibility that you are in the danger zone of Spinsterdom! Sorry sister/mister…it’s a hard truth to come to grips with, I know. Many of us didn’t choose to be here, we are just the unfortunate few who ran too slow or were too picky on the race to the aisle that we’ve been programmed to believe is normal. Heck, like me, some of you may have thought you were making your way there before life forces you to pump the brakes and next thing you know you are waking up alone in a queen sized bed back under the roof of your parents…and yes, while this was supposed to be just a temporary thing until you got back on your feet, it’s now several years later and you are quite happy planting some roots. (Rent’s expensive for single people who don’t want to end up with sharing a two bedroom with some random dude off of Craigslist!)…but I digress.
Here’s the thing. I love, love! I’m still a happy little addict trying to get my fix. You say, “Well, that’s easy–haven’t you ever heard of Tinder?” Yep! Been there, done that. Not the same thing. You see, I’m a rare soul in this world of instant gratification. I am not looking for a bandage for my broken heart, I’m looking for someone who will help share the load of my baggage and help me forget about my insecurities. It’s a little hard to find someone for a “forever” when you are constantly trying to fend off the people just trying to get in to your pants. I’m not saying every guy I’ve met has been a “I bought you lunch, time to sleep together” type, but there have been enough of them.
I know what you’re thinking: is there anything more cliche than the “I’m not like other girls” line? I agree with you, it is way over used. But in this one instance, it is the absolute truth. I am not. I enjoy deep conversation, I don’t enjoy being wined and dined and I certainly don’t sleep with people on the first, second, third or even fourth date. A deep connection is what I crave more than anything, and while I would love to throw myself head long into the hurricane dating can be, I no longer have the time or energy…Fortunately for me, I have a hopeless romantic as a best friend.
Enter the ‘Friendship Experiment’. For the next few months, I will rely solely on my best friend’s judgement as we navigate the ups and downs of the dating world. She will create a profile for me, vet potential matches and call the shots of who deserves a date (Dear God, help me!)
We hope you will join us on this crazy social experiment. Stay tuned. I’m sure much hilarity will ensue!